While the majority of the self-care I talk about relates to adults (and women), I think it is important to remember that kids need self-care too.
I do believe that self-care for kid’s looks quite similar and quite different at the same time. Kid’s self-care incorporate a lot of learning and growing like typical self-care. But, since children do not know how to care for themselves yet, their self-care usually requires the help of a parent. They might not need a bubble bath to decompress from the day, but they do need someone there to help understand their emotions.
A lot of self-care for kid’s are everyday things that they need help navigating. I think it is important that we intentionally take special care with these items because our children’s milds are growing, learning, developing, and shaping their future.
So, here is what I think is the most important self-care you can teach your kids:
Navigating Emotions
Children have so many emotions, just like you and I. The only difference is that they don’t understand them yet. When siblings play and one of them won’t share a toy, they might hit the other one. They do this because they don’t know how to navigate that emotion in the moment. It is our job as parents to teach them that emotions are real, they are valid, and they need to be processed in a healthy way. Be that safe place for your child to process their emotions!
Taking Care of Themselves
While this might be a no brainer for some people, some children have no idea how to take care of themselves. It is important to teach kids simple things like wash their hands, brush their teeth, brush their hair, and so much more. Don’t just do it for them, let them do it! Yes, it might make a mess but they will have the necessary skills for life. There is always toothpaste in my sink but I’d rather it be there and for my kids to learn than having them walk through life clueless. Obviously, the skills they need to be learning are based on age but they should always be learning. When they get older taking care of themselves turns into managing their money or finding a job.
Encouraging Their Interests
Kids are naturally curious about everything. They have a million things they want to d and a million toys they want to get their hands on. It’s hard to keep up with the interests of kids and better yet, it’s hard to find the time to keep up with all their interests. But, it is important to allow kids time to explore their interests. Right now, Lotus is very interested in cooking, which makes Jeffery very interested in cooking. Having those two in the kitchen definitely makes cooking harder, but I let them help me and explore the interest. Also, Jeffery is now curious about the potty! So, this weekend is going to be all about potty training!
Make Them Part of Everyday Life
I know what you are thinking, I see my kids everyday, they are part of my everyday life. But sometimes our life can get hectic and even though we are seeing our kids, are we really spending quality time with them? I know sometimes I pick up the kids, get home, start dinner, pick up the house, start the laundry, finish dinner, sit down to eat, work done, and before I know it, it’s bed time and the only time I have spent with the kids is kissing them goodnight. It’s life and it happens. Now, I try to incorporate them in everything I do. They stand on their chairs and help me cook some nights. If I’m working on my blog, sometimes they will come snuggle in my lap and just ask me questions. Lotus constantly wants to watch me do my hair or wash my face. I try to never turn my kids away from being included in what I am doing, even when I am frustrated or stressed.
Encourage Positive Talk
First I would like to say that I believe this goes for everyone and typically children mimic their parents talk. So if you feel like you aren’t talking positively, you might want to change it! There are a lot of things in this world that influence children and a lot of it is not positive. One of my biggest worries is that Lotus will fall into the trap that she thinks her body needs to look a certain way to be loved. This is something that I have struggled with and so I am very careful about what I say around her. Children notice the things you say even when the things you are saying are not about them. Be kind to yourself and others so your children will be kind to themselves and others.
Get Them To Do New Things
Doing new things can be so scary, even for adults! It’s important for kids to do new things just like it is important for adults to get out of their comfort zones! (see post here!). It helps them grow and it gives them confidence! Jeffery is a little go getter so he has no problems doing new things but we do encourage new things like brushing his own teeth, building with new blocks, or trying different sports. Lotus on the other hand is a little more reserved. But over the years we have encouraged her to do new things, like roller coasters, riding her bike, and so much more! She always gives us push back at first, but once she does it she has the biggest smile on her face!
Travel With Them
One of the most important things I think people can do is show their children the world outside their home. Traveling opens kids eyes up to what is out there and what they can do with their lives. If they stay in one place their whole lives, they will think there is nothing else. And, I don’t mean take them on long extravagant vacations that you can’t afford. If you live near the mountains, take them to the mountains for the day. If you live in the desert, take them to the desert. If you live near the beach, have a beach day. Take them to a museum, the zoo, the park across town, to a national landmark, just take them places! We live near the mountains and we are so fortunate that we get to take the kids quite often. Also, we plan family vacations every year. We always go see family in Missouri. We pick different camping destinations or we go up to my parents condo in the mountains. If we have money in the budget, we do a larger vacation, or we save to go on a larger vacation. I believe kids want to see the world just as much as adults do!
Kiddos are so much fun, but they do need so much guidance through life! I hope these tips make navigating their self-care a little easier!